I didn't get the chance to tell her, "you're not lacking anything because Christ is in you, therefore you don't need to match up to or outdo anyone."
I've heard on the radio recently regarding a book written by Carey Scott which addresses insecurities instilled in us by the narcissistic world around us (the need to match up to worldly standards). Anyone interested can check it out. It's called "Untangled: Let God Loosen the Knots of Insecurity in Your Life." You can also visit her website ("Untangled").
Moreover, let God's word strengthen you and enlighten you to not fall into the narcissistic trap put by the world against us.
John 10:10 (NIV):
"The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full."
John 6:35 (NIV):
"Then Jesus declared, "I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will never go hungry, and whoever believes in me will never be thirsty."
Psalm 23:1 (NLT):
"The Lord is my shepherd; I have all that I need."
Hebrews 13:5 (NLT):
"Don't love money; be satisfied with what you have. For God has said, "I will never fail you. I will never abandon you."
1 John 2:15-17 (NLT):
"Do not love this world nor the things it offers you, for when you love the world, you do not have the love of the Father in you. 16 For the world offers only a craving for physical pleasure, a craving for everything we see, and pride in our achievements and possessions. These are not from the Father, but are from this world. 17 And this world is fading away, along with everything that people crave. But anyone who does what pleases God will live forever."
The narcissists on places like social media have an abnormal obsession and compulsion to display their accomplishments to glorify themselves. They (even carnal minded Christians) do that because they do not have Christ in them. If they had Christ in them, they would be a light for Christ by promoting His kingdom, helping others, and building others (without trying to glorify themselves in that either) instead of promoting/advertising themselves and Satan.
Again, it's not just on social media, it happens wherever else we socialize (churches, schools, colleges, workplace, etc.). People can belittle you when they find that you have no vehicle or don't have a high end vehicle, the latest cellular (mobile) phone, fashionable clothing, etc. The irony is that, out of feeling inadequate and the urge to match up, you get something like a good cellular phone, the same psycho characters will get envious of you and then mistreat you. You can't ever win with narcissistic sociopaths.
Society around us has become dangerous and destructively narcissistic just like Satan (Satan is the most dangerous narcissistic sociopath)- trying to tempt and make people feel inadequate and thereby triggering them to pursue worldly desires to bring about euphoria. Coming back to marriage, this is where even carnal minded Christians (in addition to non-Christians), have made marriage into an idol (there are plenty of resources online which deal with the topic of people making marriage into an idol, so I won't post links for that). No one should forbid marriage, but it should never be forced onto anyone either (especially instilling an inadequacy in people by craving a spouse more than God). God hasn't called everyone to be married. Both Jesus (refer to Matthew 19:12) and Paul (refer to 1 Corinthians chapter 7) were clear about that. However, even Satan works through both carnal minded Christians and carnal minded non-Christians to instill an inadequacy in people to make them crave what they don't have, even marriage to the point of idolatry. The same can be said for wanting children to the point of idolizing them. Again, just like idolizing marriage, the world idolizes pre-marital relationships/flings as the answer to loneliness, romance, and sexual cravings. Many have become addicted to promiscuity as a result.
The Bible teaches who our center of attention and devotion is supposed to be, which is God, and the warning against those who tempt others to idolize anything else.
Matthew 19:27-29 (NLT):
"Then Peter said to him, “We’ve given up everything to follow you. What will we get?”
28 Jesus replied, “I assure you that when the world is made new and the Son of Man sits upon his glorious throne, you who have been my followers will also sit on twelve thrones, judging the twelve tribes of Israel. 29 And everyone who has given up houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or children or property, for my sake, will receive a hundred times as much in return and will inherit eternal life."
Luke 17:1 (NLT):
"One day Jesus said to his disciples, "There will always be temptations to sin, but what sorrow awaits the person who does the tempting!"
***The God's Word translation of the above verse indicates that tempting others causes people to lose their faith in God. The world around us deceives many people to misplace their faith in worldly things (ex. depending on other people, money, one's own strength, etc.) instead of putting their faith in God.
Luke 17:1-2 (GW):
"Jesus told his disciples, “Situations that cause people to lose their faith are certain to arise. But how horrible it will be for the person who causes someone to lose his faith! 2 It would be best for that person to be thrown into the sea with a large stone hung around his neck than for him to cause one of these little ones to lose his faith."
It's Satan's narcissism which was found as iniquity in him and thereby caused his own downfall (refer to Isaiah 14:12-15 and also Ezekiel 28:12-19).
Isaiah 14:12-15 (NLT):
“How you are fallen from heaven,
O shining star, son of the morning!
You have been thrown down to the earth,
you who destroyed the nations of the world.
13 For you said to yourself,
‘I will ascend to heaven and set my throne above God’s stars.
I will preside on the mountain of the gods
far away in the north.
14 I will climb to the highest heavens
and be like the Most High.’
15 Instead, you will be brought down to the place of the dead,
down to its lowest depths.
Ezekiel 28:12-19 (NLT):
“......You were the model of perfection,
full of wisdom and exquisite in beauty.
13 You were in Eden,
the garden of God.
Your clothing was adorned with every precious stone—
red carnelian, pale-green peridot, white moonstone,
blue-green beryl, onyx, green jasper,
blue lapis lazuli, turquoise, and emerald—
all beautifully crafted for you
and set in the finest gold.
They were given to you
on the day you were created.
14 I ordained and anointed you
as the mighty angelic guardian.
You had access to the holy mountain of God
and walked among the stones of fire.
15 “You were blameless in all you did
from the day you were created
until the day evil was found in you.
16 Your rich commerce led you to violence,
and you sinned.
So I banished you in disgrace
from the mountain of God.
I expelled you, O mighty guardian,
from your place among the stones of fire.
17 Your heart was filled with pride
because of all your beauty.
Your wisdom was corrupted
by your love of splendor.
So I threw you to the ground
and exposed you to the curious gaze of kings.
18 You defiled your sanctuaries
with your many sins and your dishonest trade.
So I brought fire out from within you,
and it consumed you.
I reduced you to ashes on the ground
in the sight of all who were watching.
19 All who knew you are appalled at your fate.
You have come to a terrible end,
and you will exist no more.” (end quote)
You can only keep your distance or stay away altogether from such people because they will destroy you and will not care/not feel guilty as their consciences are dead.